Blondes SMS

What do blondes and beer bottles have in common?
They're both empty from the neck up!

Blonde to her friend, "They say - get your Christmas shopping done early to avoid the rush but this year I did mine a whole 12 months early to avoid the rush and the shops were as busy as ever."
Merry Xmas!

In a divorce court, a woman requested the judge, "Your honour, I want to divorce my husband."
"But why?" asked the judge.
She replied, "Because he is not faithful to me."
The judge asked, "How do you know ?"
She replied, "My lord, not a single child resembles him."

Why was the blonde looking for the reverse button on her computer?
She'd been told to back up at the end of every week!

What can strike a blonde without her even knowing it?
A thought!

What did a blonde do when she read a notice in the public conveniences saying "Don't put anything down the toilet but toilet paper?"
She sat on the floor!

Did you hear about the blonde that stayed up all night to see where the sun went? It finally dawned on her!

Why did the blonde go outside with her purse open?
She had heard there was going to be some change in the weather!

Q:Why did the blonde tiptop past the medicine cabinet?
A: She didn't want to wake the sleeping pills.

Q: What did the blonde driver say when she ran out of gas?
A: Will it hurt the car if I drive with an empty tank?