And again, a delightful story. This departs widely from the generally accepted storyline, but is an interesting variation.

I am enjoying your writing-you have a good sense of atmosphere and narrative, your characters are well-formed and consistent, the historical setting seems generally accurate.

Now...what else have you posted here...

~R

aaw poor erik, hes all alone. i kinda liked this. nice story.

This piece was such a delight to read... I think it was key that you only had Erik touch and watch Marceline, rather than have her. True, it seems unlikely that he would approach a prostitute at all, but since you acknowledged it, it doesn't interfere with the story in the least. You kept him very well in character otherwise! Your work is extremely well written and thought-out. Well done!

WOw, this turned out to be really good! I read the first chapter a long time ago and I said, "This is going to be a nightmare!" But I was wrong. I was wondering when it was meant to have happened. The dates made it seem as if it happened before Erik met Christine, as the fact that he never mentioned her, led me to believe that as well. THe only problem is that in the book he made out as if he had never even touched a woman before. SO the story isn't exactly acurate in that respect, but I still think it is good. I liked the description of the room and how it changed especially. The accents were somewhat strange, but how can a person go about writing an accent in another langauge? It just doesnt' work as well. I think that the accent you chose was suficient and got the point across. COngradulations on finishing a great story.

Respectfully,

Allegratree

my first review...

so far most of the phics ive waded through are 90% tripe *braces self for attack*. Yours is one of the few i could read w/o cringing. the whole concept and the style of writing was plausible and suprisingly un-affected. it actually reminded me a bit of one sort story i read in some prize winning collection, i wish i could remember which one! I did like the ending, really, i was afraid you'd do what most people would do and kill her off/reduce her to spme seriously sad fate. I thought the dad's speech was a tad on the long side though. Other than that, seriously good stuff.

wow. that ending was so nice. i loved this. good job!

always,

LostS.

Good job. I enjoyed you story much

I really enjoyed this! I adore Kay-based fic, and this little speculation based on that one line... well, it was just lovely. It would certainly alter his later relationship with Christine, if he'd been able to be intimate with another woman in this fashion - but that isn't really the point, is it? It's just a what-if. And as such, again, it was very well done. (I wrote a Kay-based what-if ficlet myself, about that Persian slave girl; but I digress.)

I loved Marceline and her streetwise brashness - and I think that my favourite part was her reaction to his face. I've often wondered what would happen if Erik were to encounter a woman who DIDN'T shriek at the sight of his face. Someone who would be shocked, certainly, but still retain enough common sense to treat him like a human being. This fic was a lovely answer to that question.

Again, I enjoyed muchly. Thanks for writing it!

that was really good It was very emotional

I enjoyed reading the whole Phic. I did find Erik quite in character, though I think the phrase 'black desires' has been bandied about in this fnadom way too much. I also really enjoyed the oening paragraph of chapter three, it had artistry in it, though it revealed to the reader, even if they were reading it all in a sitting, you had not written it all in a sitting. It was faintly reminiscent of the first few moments of the second television episode in a 'To Be Continued' annoyance. I think that would have been better saved for a point where time had passed for the cahracters, not the author. Otherwise, wonderful.

*sigh* That was lovely, and just exactly how I would like to imagine Erik to be. Thanks for such a wonderful piece. :)

Yay! *claps* Very good, very good. Love the fact that Marceline didn't hate him. Scared me at first, when she was all crying and horrified but it was just because she was startled. *dances* Somebody finally accepted Erik! Yay! Yay! Yay! Very happy. Very good ending to. I love the fact that Marceline finally got her life on track and that she has a loving husband and family now. And Erik made a good difference in her life...very happy ending. I love happy endings. The writing was as exquisite as usual. Have you abandoned 'Patron of the Opera'? I've been waiting for quite a while now for an update...Oh, I wrote a Phan fic! It was after I saw the movie (which was quite excellent) and it's in Erik's point of view. Check it out if you wish. I doubt it will equal the caliber of your writing but I try, I try. Anyway, very good, loved the ending. Keep writing.

You finished at last. I have been waiting for the end for a long time. I liked that you did not end the story with Erik and Marceline together. It seemed appropriate. I felt sad for Erik, still being alone at the end, but there was a sort of bittersweetness to the end that was both appealing and satisfying. I hope you keep on writing.

a beautiful idea and i loved the ending. not what one would expect when you start reading this and i'm very happy for that. great job.

Ah! I LOVED it! Great job!