Like a newborn baby

Like a new puppy to

Like the child who needs help

Like the friend with nowhere to turn to

Like the stuborn man who refuses to ask

Like the woman who thinks they must keep to themselves

Like all of us

Like all of you

Sometimes trust is a hard thing to do

It makes life hard

The worst thing but true

But if you need help 

Then please just ask

It's sometimes the right thing to do

Not everyone is cold

Not everyone is untrue

So sometimes take a chance

It might really help you

What could it hurt you

If your hurting already

Sit alone in your pain

Or get help to pull through

Trust isn't easy

It must be earned is so true

But how can you earn it

If you don't take a chance too.

We expect to see white neighborhoods across the nation frantically looking for missing Caucasian females; however, there does not appear to be comparable interest in what happens to missing African American women and children. It will be interesting to see if missing African American Taysha Bultran and her five month old son rate the morning national television shows rousing the nation’s interest in finding them.  

In life we deal with many things We grow and learn to deal with them We have our dreams We have our faults We have our triumphs An we have our loss We try to do the best we can We can be lazy and just kick the can It seems to me that no matter what We always seem to come ou …

Monday was my birthday.

Tuesday was my God daughters.

Wednesday is my Grand Son's.

An this Friday is my close friends.

My Grand Father (rest his soul) was born 9 days before me.

The man who works at my Walmart store was born 2 days before me.

Where having one Big Party for all of us this week.

I'm cleaning the fish from my fishing trips for all of us to eat.

It sounds a little crazy but I swear this is all true.

I'll be surrounded by lots of Cancer's

Each is adorable and cute.

All of us have good hearts but our ages are 4 to 72.

I plan to be here next year and we'll celebrate anew.

Sometimes we feel we don't matter

Sometimes we feel we don't belong

Sometimes we wonder if we have done the right things

Sometimes we feel we've done wrong

Then something happen to change us around

Then something happen that turns our frown to a smile

Then something happen that makes it all worthwhile

Then something happen that makes us soar on a cloud

Someone touched our heart

Someone made us smile

Someone showed they care

Someone made us feel worthwhile

So if someone touched your heart

So if someone made you smile

So if someone made you feel better

Then it's your turn to do it now

Your turn to touch a heart

Your turn to make a smile

Your turn to make things better

Why don't you get started now.

Confidence is the greatest single asset we can possess because it often moves mountains. It is a product of self-esteem which, in turn, is dictated by self belief, self love, and self-value. When those three elements are absent, it is impossible to have true confidence in one's self because the essential foundation would be missing. We would have very low self-esteem which means equally low confidence to match. Low self-esteem is driven by fear: the fear of not being good enough, not being wanted and valued and being worthless and insignificant.

That is why many tips for 'boosting' one's confidence are ineffective because they ask people to do what they are not capable of. For example, one tip an article gave was this:
"Make a conscious effort not to compare yourself to others. Affirm your uniqueness. Remind yourself of your talents and strengths."

Low self-esteem is about feeling worthless. It is well nigh impossible not to compare one's self with others and be found wanting. Additionally the low confidence person cannot affirm their uniqueness, if they do not value themselves enough to appreciate that uniqueness in the first place! They also cannot focus on their talents and strengths if their weak self-belief tells them that they don't have any! It would be very difficult for them to see those strengths. Such tips are merely putting the cart before the horse!

Another tip said: "Accept yourself. Admit your mistakes and move on."
Glib and easy to say, but much harder to do. That's a silly tip because the basis of low confidence is a lack of self-acceptance, always thinking the worst of one's self. How does someone of low esteem suddenly accept him/herself? Not possible! That's what a confident person does, one who already possesses the self-belief to do so.

That is why people who simply follow 'confidence tips' might be able to cope with an immediate situation but are soon back to their normal fearful selves because the root cause of low self-esteem has not been addressed. The only sure thing to boost one's self confidence is to focus on WHY the person lacks self belief, does not love himherself or believe they have no value and slowly reduce those through gradual positive actions.

The reasons usually lie in how we are treated in childhood or in a faulty relationship somewhere. Once we can identify them and begin to understand the negative ways they affect us, and how we can turn them around to our advantage - mainly through emotional exploration and self education - we are on our way to appreciating our unique selves and building true confidence within us.

However, many people, especially men, fear that emotional exploration; fear the answers they might find, and resist it. So the low confidence and esteem continue to dog them while they often put up with behaviour which is not appropriate for them just to feel valued.

©Elaine Sihera (Ms CYPRAH) 2011
Emotional Health and People Management Consultant
"Respect and love begin with the self. If we have none, how can we give away any?"

"I start to think there really is no cure for it, that happiness is an ongoing battle, and I wonder if it isn't one I'll have to fight for as long as I live. I wonder if it's worth it."~Elizabeth Wurtzel

I live in a prison that has windows, no locks, nor keys. My prison stops me from enjoying life. It encompasses me, preventing me from having hope for the future. It chains my dreams with fear. It warps my thoughts with gullibility, innocence, and naivety. It surrounds all of my actions with guilt. It prevents any pride I might have, reminding me that I am broken.

I am the outcome of my life and my life is the outcome of me. I have no strength to fight for myself. I will take all the responsibility. I will take all the heartache. I will take all the resentment. I will keep it in my heart, though I know it not. I will care for it. I will cultivate it in my memories. It will replay like a soundtrack, over and over again. It corrupts, it taints, the vision of myself.

I must see the world through rose colored glass. I must replay those things that drown out the illogical, the confusing, the normal. If I do not, then I will have absolutely no hope. It is only in the ideal that the world is better than I know it, can I persevere in my existence. No one else is broken, what can I not touch like the others. Vague shadows of what I should be like haunt my dreams. They isolate me from those around me. No one is as bad as I. For my sins, I have no excuse. I am broken. How will I be fixed?

Sloth, confusion, anger, sadness, rejection, stupidity, regret, loneliness, filter through my heart like a looped Mp3, daily. There have never been floodgates to my memories. Those things I wish would end, never have. Any purpose for me has long been murdered. The only glimmer of recollection comes from the salvation I offer others. I must not allow another to be damned the way I have been. The only rest my mind finds is in the stringently familiar.  

When I needed parents to cherish me, I had none. When I needed someone to protect me from the violence, there was no succor. Crying out in my pain, the fates exchanged one pain for another. The relief of one agony was exchanged for another.

The resentment, the prejudice, the physical abuse was exchanged for the sexual abuse. The sexual abuse was exchanged for the neglect and physical abuse of the foster care system, just to return back to the deception and abuse from my parents once again.

All of my experiences, all of my pain, replay through my life. The actors have changed, but the script remains the same. My life has corrupted my actions; my actions have corrupted my life. I do good deeds not for unselfish reasons. I do them in the hopes that my act will prevent others from living what is my existence. I strive to help the needy. I work to comfort the broken hearted. I try to give companionship to the lonely. Yet, for all my effort, there are many who have thanked me, but there are none who comfort me. I am abandoned, cast aside once again, like so much litter on the street.

There is no such thing as love. Men have no honor. The truth that is proclaimed has no facts, only distorted opinions of the selfish and fearful. Mankind talks of hope. Hope for good, hope for salvation, hope for tomorrow. There is no hope. Hope is the greatest lie conceived by religion. To have hope is to relinquish the responsibility of personal choice in your own life.

The only faintest truth to hope is in regards to the action that you do this day, this hour, this minute, and this very second. The decision you make this moment will dictate what decision you will make an hour from now. If you choose to follow down the path of bad decisions, then you will be caught in the net of despair. To climb out of the net takes an amazing force of will. That will, all men have if they see fit to make the changes to their lives.

The local drug dealer, the car thief, the drunk, I can easily look to them and excuse their behavior. It is in the prostitutes and the forgotten children of the world that I find purpose. They all have reasons for their confusions, their distortions, and their emotions. Some sort of abuse, a past trauma, that has taken a perfectly meaningful life and destroyed their vision, starved their hope, and ruined their personal salvation.

I cannot let anyone in my life. Those who I have in the past have found fault with me. As my wife went out the door she made two remarks that still pain me greatly:

"I do not even know why I stayed with you this long. You’re boring. Instead of going out and having fun, all you do is work on the computer and watch the same anime. You are too shy. You only know how to speak about work. Besides, why would I want to stay with a loser like you? You probably won't live past 40 anyway with your medical issues. I still have plenty of living to do then to waste it with someone who won't be with me when I get old."

Her comment echoes through my head like a mighty oracle. Each minute brings her prophecy about my life closer to fruition. Fleeting are the joys that we had shared together. I had always thought she enjoyed going to the museums, restaurants and downtown life of Seattle. I was never one for dancing; I am more of a ball room dancer. Something much more intimate than gyrating my hips with every other person in the group.

The years of abuse I took from her, and the way I abused her back through my neglect still weigh heavily on my conscience. I did not mean to neglect her; I only sought safety from the illogical, the unexpected, and the uncontrollable. Thoughts, emotions, changes, the randomness of life constantly bombard, assail, and distract me. What do I do when I am not prepared? What does it mean to be prepared? What if I think I am prepared but I am not? What will I do?  

I have no family, no friends, no wife, no loves, no one to express my heart the passions that burn within my breast. So I continue on, showing my love on a limited basis to those that need it most. It is in the helping of the abandoned that I can find the only purpose for continuing my sad, lonely, isolated existence. There are none that want me; there is none who will have me. I have not yet learned how to love myself. At least, I can love others.

"For everything you have missed, you have gained something else, and for everything you gain, you lose something else."~Ralph Waldo Emerson

I think I should let anyone who may read my material (often) know that I, LD, have officially let my parents know that I am doing this. I'm a bit on edge but I felt like my parents and I were at a breaking point where no one quite knew what to do with the other party. It has been a long and nerve wracking 15 hours and I'm still a bit uncertain about the whole thing. This has been my secret for three years now and I am still unsure about everything now that I am not the only one who knows the person behind the screen name.

I do feel like some sort of censor has been placed upon what I write, in a way that I monitor myself around my parents, part of me wants to push that onto the internet. However, just because I have another person or two reading what I write should and will not change the things that I do or say. I know my parents will disagree with a lot of what I write about, but opinions are a part of life and I can form my own, separate from theirs.

So, to the people who do have the power to do what I fear the most in life (and you probably know what it is): I hope you respect the decisions that I have made and I hope that you will continue to let me do what I am passionate about. I have no doubt that you will have many questions and concerns about my choices and actions, and most particularly, my words, but I have been doing this for far longer than it takes to grow comfortable. I have handled myself in the past and will continue to do the same in the present and future. It will take time for you to accept what I do, and I understand that. I am sixteen now, and I think far beyond my years. My independence is important to me, and I wish that my world on the internet and my world outside remain as separate as possible.

I truly look forward to reunion with you.

As I get older I found the saying is true

I’ve become wiser than I ever thought I knew

Things that once bothered me

Well they no longer do

Things that once made me laugh

Well there no longer funny it’s true.

When I was young I took great risk

I’d swim with sharks

I’d jump from cliffs

I never worried about getting injured

When it happened well who cares I figured

Now the bones don’t heal as quickly

Now taking risk does seem very silly

Life’s too short to be thrown away

The real challenge is to live another day

So wiser now that I’ve become

I can see in my youth that I was real dumb

I played around and took the chances

I risk my life at whims and glances

No more for me I tell you now

Time to live from here on out.

As I read of Americans moving away from marriage as the national norm, I wonder if cohabitants really appreciate the mental anguish their lifestyle portends when the Angel of Death comes to visit their soul mate and they find themselves left outside when it comes to managing this end of life drama.

I chatted with a woman who was originally born in Ireland who shared a story of losing her soul mate using dry tears. I had seen her come to church for some time, but I was not aware that she had moved away. I ran across her appearing to be walking aimlessly through my Wilmington DE neighborhood.

She remembered me from church, so she immediately poured forth with her mental anguish. This Irish woman first shared the number of European countries in which she lived when she was a young attractive woman. However, she now dreads the wrinkles coming around her eyes that tell of her fifty plus years’ age.    

When she could no longer contain her feelings this Irish woman shared that her cohabitant died of throat cancer three weeks ago. She was devastated for he was a man who had no use for doctors and refused to do as they instructed him.

This Irish woman reported that her lover never took the prescribed medication. He would not make doctors' visits. What seem to hurt her most is she was powerless to insist on the lover taking care of himself for she had no marital rights.

The Irish woman attempted to paint a picture of her anguish. She said the lover was a man of 140 pounds before the cancer struck. His health deteriorated to where he could not swallow that made his weight drop to 70 pounds by his death.   

This Irish woman said the lover suffered from depression. He lived with his daughter and refused any friends. The Irish woman felt the lover did not want people to see him in his deteriorated state.

The Irish woman said by the time her lover decided to accept help from the doctors the Grim reaper had already won the life and death battle for now he was terminally ill. She said he started chemotherapy but he was dead in three weeks of the start of this treatment.  

As she walked away I found myself being thankful that I have my wife Gwynelle to guide my medical treatments when I might want to be recalcitrant. Furthermore, it is more important that Gwynelle has the legal clout to override all other decisions and not merely standing by watching me commit suicide through stubbornness.  

I am a strong proponent of marriage because no one is promised a healthy tomorrow.   The marital vowel of richer or poorer, sickness or health, until death do us apart are really the underpinning of long term marriage. If you are 21 today, a car accident tomorrow can rewrite your life script, so never believe you are too young to think fully about the marital vow you take. Also today’s player may find herself or himself a broken individual without support when the Grim-reaper attacks with deadly diseases of aging.  

Today’s players want to bear in mind that biological children may not care about you in times of need; especially, if you showed very little support for them during their upbringing. Hence, you reap what you sow.  

Confidence is the greatest single asset we can possess because it often moves mountains. It is a product of self-esteem which, in turn, is dictated by self belief, self love, and self-value. When those three elements are absent, it is impossible to have true confidence in one's self because the essential foundation would be missing. We would have very low self-esteem which means equally low confidence to match. Low self-esteem is driven by fear: the fear of not being good enough, not being wanted and valued and being worthless and insignificant.

That is why many tips for 'boosting' one's confidence are ineffective because they ask people to do what they are not capable of. For example, one tip an article gave was this:
"Make a conscious effort not to compare yourself to others. Affirm your uniqueness. Remind yourself of your talents and strengths."

Low self-esteem is about feeling worthless. It is well nigh impossible not to compare one's self with others and be found wanting. Additionally the low confidence person cannot affirm their uniqueness if they do not value themselves enough to appreciate that uniqueness in the first place! They also cannot focus on their talents and strengths if their weak self-belief tells them that they don't have any! It would be very difficult for them to see those strengths. Such tips are merely putting the cart before the horse!

Another tip said: "Accept yourself. Admit your mistakes and move on."
That's a really silly tip because the basis of low confidence is a lack of self-acceptance, always thinking the worst of one's self. How does someone of low esteem suddenly accept himherself? Not possible! That's what a confident person does, one who already possesses the self-belief to do so.

That is why people who simply follow 'confidence tips' might be able to cope with an immediate situation but are soon back to their normal fearful selves because the root cause of low self-esteem has not been addressed. The only sure thing to boost one's self confidence is to focus on WHY the person lacks self belief, does not love him/herself or believe they have no value.

The reasons usually lie in how we are treated in childhood or in a faulty relationship somewhere. Once we can identify them and begin to understand the negative ways they affect us, and how we can turn them around to our advantage - mainly through emotional exploration and self education - we are on our way to appreciating our unique selves and building true confidence within us.

However, many people, especially men, fear that emotional exploration; fear the answers they might find, and resist it. So the low confidence and esteem continue to dog them while they put up with behaviour which is not appropriate for them just to feel valued.

Today someone smiled at you

Remember to pas it on

Today someone said Hello

Remember to pass it on

Someone offered you a ride

Someone kept your place in line

Someone stop to help you out

Remember to pass it on

Someone gave you a needed hug

Someone gave you a shoulder to cry on

Someone called just to say hello

Someone text you a funny joke

Remember to pass it on

For you someone stop what they where doing

For you someone held a door open

For you someone donated blood

For you someone showed you love

For you today might have only been about living

For you today should be about giving

Someone helped you in this life

It's all about giving back that makes things right

So if something nice just happened today

Remember that gift and pass it on in your own way

The invalid concept of Sexual Orientation and 'homosexuality'/ 'homosexual' allows the anti-man forces in the western society to distort information to further malign love between two men -- by removing the difference between a man's love for men that includes sex, and the promiscuous sex mostly between third genders that like men and other third genders or men. 

This article on medicineplus, is a good example of this. Here's a quote from the article:

Risk factors for hepatitis B infection include:

• Being born, or having parents who were born in regions with high infection rates (including Asia, Africa, and the Caribbean)
• Being infected with HIV
• Being on hemodialysis
• Having multiple sex partners
• Men having sex with men

Now, the article mentions 'men having sex with men' as a separate category from having multiple sex partners. It's clear that the article makes no distinction between two men who have a mutually monogamous relationship with each other, and the third gender gays who have promiscuous sex with several males, including men. 

This can be taken to mean that even two male partners in a mutually monogamous relationship with each other, are at a risk of getting infection, while only promiscuous heterosexual sex will cause it. 

This makes the attribute of sex between men a 'personal property' of the promiscuous gays, who are more like whores.

The same misinformation, in the name of science, is spread in HIV AIDS prevention campaigns funded and controlled by the west ... all over the world. 

In fact, if you go to donate blood, they don't ask you if you have multiple partners or not, but rather whether you are an 'active homosexual'. Now if a man who has never had sex with anyone else but his one man partners, in a mutually monogamous relationship ... he'd still be clubbed with the 'gays' (wrongly defined as men who have sex with men) and be disqualified from donating blood.

Well so far June, 2011 will go down in history as a fairly crappy month. Right up front this is not about "poor me", in fact the point I hope to get across is quite the opposite.

It is certainly one thing for a person to be struck with an illness or disease that no one could have seen coming, or explain. Then there are those moments in time, when you realize and begin to accept that you have earned every bit of pain and discomfort you are experiencing. I want this to serve as a warning to the young and still stupid. You can make better decisions now.

I picked up my first drink at around 12 years old. I stole a sealed bottle of Lord Calvert from the 3rd step-father....I blacked out, got my ass kicked...and couldn't wait to do it again....

There are few old school drugs I have not at-least tried...from my first duty station in the Navy to mid-life I periodically went on binges that would often end in unexplained head injuries and county jail cells.

The fact is, although I am a recovering, productive (as much as health will allow) member of my family and community today, the damage done has a good memory....So what did all that FUN get me?

After 3 years of misdiagnosis...I was told I was having "Panic Attacks" I had my 1st gran mal seizure of 3 within 24 hours on June 2, 2011....apparently I was having little ones for awhile. (around 3 years...)

My memory has been weak since 2005 after I came out of a 6 day coma that my family was told I would never wake from, now my daily thought life is like an "Etch-n-Sketch", after every petite mal, my day starts over. The meds they gave me 1st are not working, so I have started another, both poison and I can't stop the original for at-least 2 months...they have put me in a study using Aricept on multiple brain trauma patients with memory loss....along with about 4 other "wonder" drugs my stomach has become a toxic mess.

At 44 years old, one more gran mal without someone around, and it very well could be over....

So youngins, you have the same choice we all do. It didn't seem to matter when I was 18 or 25, but today with 2 boys at home under 10 and the most beautiful little 5 year old girl on the planet.......well you do the figuring.

I am positive all will work out, the mini stroke didn't effect much long term, and one of these manufactured poisons is going to work.

So by all means, have a good time, drink, smoke and party all night...just once in awhile, think of those who one day will be lost after your funeral...

Just My Experience & Opinion.

Maddad

It's Fathers Day weekend

It means we'll get more ties

Some of us will get socks

Some might even get new tires

It's Father's Day Weekend

I might just get a new Grill

Means I'll be doing the cooking

But I know I'll just have to break it in

It's Fathers Day weekend

Will we get breakfast in bed

Will we get a new Lawn Mower

That John Deer looks to be expensive

Will it be a new weed eater

Or a nice mulcher will do

What ever we get it surely come from you

It will come from the heart

It will come with a smile

It will be gladly accepted

On this day of days

The one day for us

The real Fathers this day

I just finished a good article in our electric co-op magazine and I felt it was important enough to write about it here on the vine, tick season is gearing up and Lyme disease is growing in many areas.

First, Lyme disease is spread by the Deer tick, not the Wood tick. There is a difference so learn more about ticks and learn to identify them. While most deer ticks are found in areas of woods and where there are high populations of deer, they can also be found in suburban areas and in your yard and are brought there by birds and other small animals and if you have high deer populations near by then you may have deer ticks in your yard already.

 Signs and symptoms of the disease are joint aches and pains, nervous system abnormalities, odd repetative and circular rashes on your body, swollen lymph nodes, fever and chills, headaches, heart rhythm irregularities and an over all pervasive feeling of being tired and sleepy.

Here are some preventative measures to help you with.

1. remove leaves, brush and tall grass near your home and in your yard. Also remove any plants that attract deer into your yard

2. Avoid tick areas all together, especially during May, June and July.

3. Wear light colored clothing so you can see the very small black creatures on your clothing when you are walking in the woods. They are about the size of a pencil point and can go unnoticed very easily.

4. Tuck pants into your socks as you hike or fish in these tick areas.

5. Tape the areas where your pants and socks meet.

6. Use deet and spray your clothes and exposed skin areas (do not spary your face with this stuff though).

7. Wear hats and long sleeved shirts for protection from ticks.

8. Walk in the center of trails and paths and avoid overhanging grass and brush. Walking in high grass is asking for a tick to climb aboard, avoid this at all costs, (ticks go onto this stuff and stand on the high points and wait for passing bodies to latch onto).

9. After you are outdoors, go and take all your clothes off and inspect your whole body. (once when we were berry picking my Dad found a wood tick in his belly button hours later).

10. Always take a showerd ans wash and dry your clothes with high tempertures to kill any ticks on them

A little prevention goes along way.

If you see these signs of strange and circular rashes and if you suspect or know you have bitten by any insect , go to the doctor immediatly and tell them you suspect you were bitten by a tick. Many doctors are still in the dark about Lyme disease symptoms and will look for other things that may cause these symptoms (don't ever trust your doctor to know everything).

One other thing, pets can get lyme disease and those ticks can come into your home and attack you. Use flea and tick prevention if your pet is an outside animal and even if they only go out in the backyard. When you bring them in groom them with a flea comb all over, especially on their underparts and dark color fur areas. If your pet starts acting strange and loses their appetite take them to the vet and ask for a Lyme disease test whne they are being treated by your vet.

If you need or want more information on symptoms and prevention go to the Center for Disease Control web site. WWW.cdc.gov and click on diseases and conditions.

Take care of youslef and your pets, Lyme diseae is very dibilitating and quick actions will help you if you have been bitten by a deer tick.

I wake each day to a new beginning

It's a new day of life you see

A chance to make a difference in this world

A chance to shine so brightly

A blessing has been given

I shall not take it for granted

Today I'll make a difference

Today gives me another chance

It's a chance to help a friend in need

Or maybe someone I don't know at all

To make a difference in a strangers life

Just wouldn't be bad at all

Yes to see a stranger smile today

A chance to make a new friend

Just maybe they'll pass on the same blessing

If it continues then the whole world can be friends

The appropriate answer to this question and the one most women would agree with is: men lie, men cheat, men do not respect women, men are pigs, dogs, Dbags and it’s their entire fault! In a way this is accurate however, the main reason women are so insecure is because they lack self esteem!

When a man approaches a woman it’s because something physical about her caught his attention: the hair, the smile, the body, etc. if a man still continues to talk to that woman, it’s because he thinks she not only has a physical attribute that attracts him but also is a pleasant person to be around [or he wants to get laid].

Now after that initial encounter and a first date, if he still wants to go out with a woman, it means he is really interested. It’s not even only about sex anymore [although it still may] if he’s putting an effort into it.

Bottom line is, the man will; not pursue you if he didn’t think it was worth it, even if he’s a loser, a d-bag, unattractive, etc.

If a man is investing his time on you, it’s because there’s something about you he likes and if he loses that interest it’s either because he got what he wanted from you –sex- [which it’s not his fault if you gave it to him or because what or who he thinks you were was not true[to him].

If the man continues to go out with a woman it’s because he really likes her. The male species isn’t meant to attach themselves and settle. They are reproducers and that’s what they mainly do. So if he settled for you, it’s because you mean a lot to him.

But then some women freak out once a guy picks them to date exclusively, and start to make all kinds of mistakes such as compare the new guy to the last guy who cheated on her and lied. They start to question, try to read texts messages, look at his friend’s on facebook and cyber stalk him, try to find out if he’s really with his buddies or with someone else when he’s out. OK, even if a guy likes you, he can only take that for so long. It’s not worth to go through all the frustration to be with someone. No one would like that.

Every man is a new experience. People need to let go of past experiences and experience each one as what they are: new. Not one person is exactly like the other and every human being makes mistakes. Lack of confidence will drive people out of your life. If he’s with you, it’s because there’s something about you that he really likes that makes him put up with all other things he doesn’t like.

If he looks at other women, it’s normal. All men do! Be proud that you’re the one he’s going home with. Yes, you are allowed to be jealous [the cutre type that makes them feel like they are important to you] but not the psycho one!

If he cheats on you and has not left you, it’s because he still likes you more than whoever he cheated on you with. He might be looking for a replacement or he just got bored and wanted to experiment something new. It’s up to you to accept it or not.

But the main thing to remember is that no one belongs to anyone. If he left and will not answer your calls and/or texts, that’s it, he’s gone. There is nothing you can do that will make him come back. He might for the sex but not for the relationship.

Women really need to stop going after the men, women need to be more confident. If he won’t answer your calls, honey, others will. Move on, there’s no such things as “the best guy I’ve been with”, or “the best sex I’ve ever had”. The rabbit could give you the best orgasm ever and it’s just a toy!

He doesn’t call you back, then don’t call him until he does it. Don’t text, don’t try to find out where he is or what he’s doing. If he wanted you to know he’d find a way to let you know.

What women don’t realize is that the fact that they go after these Dbags enables them to keep doing what they do.

Be confident! Have your self esteem up so high that no one can ever reach it. There are plenty of fish in the sea and no matter how long it takes, you will find another one, maybe even better.

Some women are not physically attractive but what attracts men to them is their self esteem. This is why you wonder why such a hot guy is dating such a fat girl while you got such a hot body. What’s the point of being so hot if you don’t value yourself?

Nobody likes insecure people. We need to be the first and the ones to believe in ourselves because the truth is, no one else will and if they do they will doubt it until you prove them right, or wrong.

To the people who think they fooled us, I say, "We are not fooled by you liars." To the people who are spraying Corexit and flying those planes of genocidal chemicals we say, "Find an honest job, because you are helping the devil do his deeds." To the people who told us, "It's gone - the spill has disappeared, there is just a little poison out there," we say, "Dilution is not the solution to pollution." To the wealthy who did not want to see this wash up on their shores, so if not seen, it doesn't exist, or the universities taking billions to study this, I say, "TAKE CARE OF THE PEOPLE WHO ARE DYING AND ARE GOING TO DIE. GO TO THEIR HOMES, THEIR SHORES AND THEIR ONCE SACRED FISHING GROUNDS." These people are the sidewalk scientists. They have lived on the land for generations, and they know their terrain and the waters they love and respect. Get out of your institutions of delusion, your board rooms and legal money laundering, ivy covered ivory towers, and look at the full picture. If you lose the people, you have no stewards and in the end you will choke on greed, money and oil.

Is preserving and reviving cursive handwriting retro sentimentality or neo-Luddism? No, it's good teaching and good neuroscience.

Love is like a two edged pendulum sword on a grandfather clock where in its oscillations it lays open your heart to happiness then, as a thief in the night; it severs your passionate arteries with the pains of life’s events that snatches this dearest from your grasp. I was  …

With the rain pouring down With the wind howling around The lights going out Those fierce and unearthly sounds. We did not sit in silence We did not sit in fear We laughed amongst ourselves We played games and told stories dear

This is the best crit of Siddharta Mukherjee' opus I have yet read, the critic being actually a victim of cancer himself and quite the loquacious, if a bit jaded, writer.

Feeling stressed by the newspaper headlines, your spouse, significant other or children? It is imperative to keep calm and carry on, which is an old WWII slogan popular in England.

The first thing is to remember that there are three states of mind: the emotional, the reasonable, and the wise. Your goal is to always remain in wise mind. Why? Picture the reasonable mind as a circle, and the emotional mind as another circle, close to, but not touching reasonable mind. Picture wise mind overlapping these two circles. The areas of overlap are considered wise mind. The reasonable mind fails because it doesn't take into account the emotional impact of various happenings to the mind. Likewise, the emotional mind fails to act with enough reasonable impact of the same happenings. Wise mind takes into account both worlds, discarding what it doesn't need and welcoming what it does need. Both the reasonable and emotional states of mind are extremely judgmental, whereas wise mind is non-judgmental.

When you are stressed out, the senses can deceive or fail you. The best thing to do is to take the senses one by one, and non-judgmentally evaluate your surroundings. For instance, where I am sitting right now:

I see a grey wall. I see books. I see a plant.

I hear soothing music. I hear my coworker typing. I hear the sounds of the computer.

I feel the smooth computer keys. I feel the softness of the wrist guard. I feel the warm air from the outdoors.

I taste the soft drink I have to drink. It is sweet.

I smell the fragrance of the plant. I smell my perfume.

These will all snap you back to reality without going off on a wild, emotional tangent. It will also help you to discern what is real from what is perceived and perhaps misconstrued.

I hope you have found this helpful. This is the first in a series of coping skills that I will have running here on Newsvine.

The peace within is easy to find You just have to close your eyes. Let the days troubles fall far behind An think of the people who love you. Remember your childhood Think of your friends Think of your mother and father

Yesterday I had the pleasure of meeting Dante Jacuzzi and participating in a demonstration of Jason's new MicroSilk tub. This technology uses anions, or negatively charged ions, to attract to the dirt on your skin which is slightly positively charged to remove it from your body. At first, I was very skeptical but now am sold on it and plan to buy one as soon as my finances allow me to.

What sold me on the technology was the fact that my extremely scarred left hand went into the water, and 20 minutes later my scars were barely visible. This effect lasted about four hours. Dante explained that with repeated use, most people with bad scars experience reduced visibility and some healing of the affected tissue which is cleaned by the oxygen molecules. They are also using these microbubbles to sterilize surgical instruments.

As soon as you press the button, the water fills with a milky-looking cloud of bubbles which are actually microbubbles. They measure 1/100 of the size of a bubble produced by the average air tub. When the anions react with the water, energy is released that keeps the water warm, which means you should not have to add additional hot water. Dante explained that it is not uncommon to measure the water temperature at the start of a demonstration and have it read a few degrees higher by the end of the demonstration. This makes the tub 'green'. You soak for about 20 minutes (or longer, if you are so inclined) and when you remove yourself from the water, all body parts that have soaked in it are baby smooth and silky soft. Since the water is supersaturated with oxygen molecules, it completely cleans hair and pores of debris, thus eliminating the need for soap or shampoo.

As we sat there soaking, Dante went on to explain the benefits of the tub. The Jacuzzi tub was invented by the Jacuzzi family because one of the sons had rheumatoid arthritis so badly as a juvenile that he was required to go to the hospital every day for a therapy tub treatment. Since Jacuzzi was already famous for inventing the water pump, Mr. Jacuzzi applied his pump technology to a bathtub and it became what we know today as "the jacuzzi". The MicroSilk technology can be applied to a soaking bath or combined with either an airtub or whirlpool sold by Jason as an additional health benefit.

I am not being paid to write or post this. I simply experienced something very cool yesterday and wanted to share it with you all. If you have a loved one suffering from illness, you might want to inquire your insurance company about using your benefits to help you purchase a Jason hydrotherapy tub with MicroSilk. And if you're in the market for a whirlpool or air tub, you may want to give this new technology a good look.

Rightwing Republican leaders Rush Limbaugh (De facto Chairman of the Republican National Committee) and 2012 Presidential hopeful Newt Gingrich (Former Speaker of the US House of Representatives) position themselves as Biblical overseers sharing their anointed wisdom with the Am …

Praise and encouragement are essential ingredients in our lives, yet the majority of people are denied them because we are inclined to praise if our confidence is high, and to be critical if our confidence is low. Yet regular praise (personal affirmation and reinforcement) is important if we are to increase self assurance and self esteem. They represent our worth to others.

To begin with, encouragement is crucial when we are young to help us to develop positive attitudes to life, to instil the fact that we are responsible for our own fate and to nurture the belief that anything is possible, if we are determined. However, many parents, who have been denied praise themselves, also deny it to their youngsters, often feeling embarrassed to tell their children how much they love them and how wonderful they are. Not getting this necessary feedback, and possibly being criticised most of the time, many youngsters grow up with the mistaken belief that their parents do not care about them too much, or they are really crap at certain things. This robs them of the confidence and self-esteem to become positive, achieving adults.

In relationships the cycle continues. Wives and husbands (or partners/lovers) who have been denied praise for their honest efforts withhold it from their spouses too. There is often grudging acknowledgement of each person's domestic or professional role but no real praise for the personal contributions of each partner. Eventually, resentment at a lack of appreciation kills praise all round and helps negativity to thrive.

Work is even worse. Many people toiling away in organisations as small important cogs in big machines seldom get any praise for keeping that venture going. They are seen as 'just doing their jobs' and should really get on with it. Yet it takes very little commitment to complete a job in the manner expected. It takes much more to believe in what that organisation is doing and commit one's self to its ethos, ideals and objectives. It's actually a lack of praise and appreciation which keeps employees from performing to their utmost.

Personal Value to Others
If you are working on a packaging line daily and no one ever comes and tells you how well you are packing the items, or fulfilling the orders, you will eventually see what you are doing as just a means to an end instead of something in which you could take greater pride and joy. If there were to be regular checks on how well you pack, your opinions canvassed on how the packing could be improved, and frequent information on what is happening to the end product, you would have a greater stake in the efficiency and service of that organisation. Your self esteem and commitment would gradually increase because your value to the company would be linked with its fortunes, not just superficially as an aid to the profits, but as an essential part of its future.

Those who are not used to praise might pretend it does not matter, but when we are singled out for any particular honour it is likely to be the greatest moment of our lives. No matter how embarrassed we are, or how we try to dismiss it, that moment will be one of the first to be recalled; the one we make special note of; the one we share with family and friends and the one we look back on and savour with a great deal of pride and joy.

Ask anyone who has met Royalty, Presidents or won an award, especially those Oscar winners, or simply being valued by significant others, and they will tell you there is nothing like that moment of affirmation and reinforcement. It is a moment to cherish, a true acknowledgement of being 'special'. To deny praise for a job well done ignores our special input, kills commitment, erodes confidence ad breeds apathy. There are too many managers who concentrate on the task to be done and not on the staff doing it. Yet if staff are left to concentrate on the job and the managers on their workforce: praising, helping, encouraging and appreciating, then the three big Cs – commitment, contribution and competence – would significantly increase.

Elaine Sihera (Ms CYPRAH) 2011
Emotional Health Adviser
"Respect and love begin with the self. If we have none, how can we give away any?"

Sitting here on another rainy day Just waitng for the sun rise To chase the clouds away. The birds are all quiet The sky filed with grey Seems where all waiting for the sun To chase the blues away. Please don't get me wrong

Today is really a Good Day Why because you woke up of course Each day is really a good day It brings new choice's for us Will I go fishing Will I go to the park Will I take time to smell the flowers Will I go to the track and try my luck

If only Words we use everday 2 words we should never use together It means Regret in so many ways It means we regret the moves we made. If only I said I love you more If only I had done the little things If only I had made it there in time

Well, on Sunday I'll turn 42 years old. When I woke up this morning, I thought I would like nothing better than to have a dyslexic birthday and be turning 24 instead.

Then I remembered what it was like to be 24. Sure, there were fewer wrinkles on the face and less dimples on the butt. But was it really such a good time? When I was 24 I was working as a Lead Assembler for a telecommunications firm for $7.50 per hour. I was married to a jealous, overbearing control freak. I didn't have a decent car, good credit or any money in the bank. I had a one-year-old son who frequently witnessed interrogations.

Today, I have an 18-year-old son and a 10-year-old daughter. I have divorced the control freak and remarried. I have a house, a car, a truck, money in the bank and great credit. I'm told I don't look a day over 32. I have a light job working 35 hours a week answering the phones at a plumbing wholesaler and expand my knowledge by taking classes and advantage of opportunities such as attending the upcoming Citizens' Police Academy and training for NAMI. I would never have been allowed to do all that with my ex-husband steering the ship.

Then there's the experience that you only get by living life. If someone trampled my rights when I was 24, I was merely hurt and without recourse. Try that on me today and you'll find yourself slapped with a lawsuit or under arrest or both. I know how to heal owies, calm down a hysterical child, sell Girl Scout cookies and engineer a Pinewood Derby car. I know when to take my car to a mechanic and when to let my husband deal with car problems. I've taught my son how to drive and my daughter how to handle big girl emotions.

So, as of noon today, I have decided that I will have a dyslexic birthday. I will be 24 again when I go for walks with the kids, take pictures with my camera, and go on vacation this year. I will be 24 when I wake up in the morning and won't feel the pain of two herniated discs in my neck. I will be 24 when I look to the future and plan for at least 60 more years on the planet.

However, I will not be wondering where my next meal is coming from, if my husband is going to get fired today, and best of all I won't have to put up with the hairstyles of the '90s. Yes, a dyslexic birthday encompassing the best of both worlds is the answer. May you have one too!

The day of love has slowly passed Our hearts where filled with joy Now we plan our next holiday To help our hearts to soar We can try to make it for the spirit Or we can just plan to make it fun Whatever we do we know this one thing

Dear Newsvine Community,

I am sure by now that most of you have heard the news, but for those of you that have not, I shall start with that. Within this past week, scientists have published a study testing our water supplies for harmful, if not toxic, substances. On this report, many of the toxins in our ecosystem have intensified at a normal pace. However, this report highlights the fact that one toxic substance has substantially increased its presence in America's water supplies, and in some places, reaching unsafe levels in vital bodies of water.

This toxin is known as dihydrogen monoxide (DHMO). It is a substance found in all water supplies normally, but have recently surged in the percentages that they have been found in. For example, in one underground lake in Texas, scientists have tested water samples and have found the DHMO toxin to be above 90% of the total lake. Other lakes also have astronomical levels of this toxin.

Consuming large amounts of DHMO, according to the report, may lead to a surge in urinary activity. It is also a potential cause of skin defects including abnormal wrinkling.

Our politicians have taken numerous steps to push for green technology in our country as well as a national cleanup of our ecosystems, however none of them are willing to take on the responsibility of removing the DHMO. I am requesting that every viner who cares about our ecosystem to ask their representatives to jumpstart a cleanup of this chemical.

As more DHMO enters our environment, our bodies of water will, one by one, become unsafe for consumption and use. We need to stop this chemical before it becomes too much of a problem.

Leafy~

This in fact is a really old joke that I wanted to test our community with. Dihydrogen Monoxide is in fact, H2O, normally referred to as "water". I just wanted to see if anyone was taken for a ride, after a decade of this joke being in existence.

So did you fall for it?

There is nothing I hate more than having a doctor's appointment. Waiting rooms filled with sick people (and kids) make me cranky. Being kept waiting 45 minutes past my appointment time doesn't put a smile on my face either. I always tell the gynecologist that I would prefer to have root canal without anesthesia. To be fair, I tell the dentist that I would rather give birth to triplets in an open field. Doctor's "visits" are not social calls!

The humid weather in Florida is responsible for a myriad of diseases. Allergies, rashes, bug bites and itchy eyes are all common ailments. Recently, I developed a rough patch of skin on the outside of my thigh. Approximately the size of a quarter, it was merely unsightly, not painful.
Home remedies seemed to be in order. A tube of steroid ointment left over from some long forgotten injury was my first choice. The ointment worked great... for a few days. Once I stopped using it, the rash returned – no bigger, no smaller – it was just there. My next step was to buy a tube of cortisone cream. Nada. Nothing. No change.

Since the spot didn't itch, I usually forgot about it until shaving my legs brought it to my attention. Weeks passed. Suddenly, I noticed a second spot about the size of a dime. With foreboding, I made an appointment with my primary care physician. "Nothing to worry about," she said. "Use this cream." I filled the prescription and dutifully applied it twice a day. Another week passed. Nada. Nothing. No change.

About this time, my dog also developed a patch of dry skin on her leg. I began spraying her with the anti-fungal medicine the vet sold me… no appointment necessary. Worked like a charm. Could I be so lucky? That night, I sprayed my leg before going to bed. By morning, the rash was almost gone. Two more days and, poof, the flaky skin had disappeared never to return.

The steroid ointment found in the medicine cabinet cost $32. The cortisone cream cost $4.98. The prescription from my doctor ran me another $15 plus the $15 co-pay. None of those products were effective. The anti-fungal spray from the vet cost $5.00 and worked immediately. In the future, when I am sick, I'm calling the vet.

The day is almost here The day we show those we love them with cheer The Flower stores will be over run The Candy Stores will have so much fun The stores that sell Jewelry will have their best sales It's a day of smiles seen everywhere

My mother was 96 years old when she passed away in November 2009. Until two week before her death, she still lived on her own – cooking and cleaning for herself. When she wasn't busy with those chores, she drove my sister and me crazy with her demands. We firmly believed she was going to outlive both of us because neither God nor Satan was too keen on her joining them. In my mind, I have always envisioned this scene.

Interior/Heaven: Mom at death's door. God and Satan huddled behind the door, whispering to each other.

God: Be quiet. Maybe she'll go away.

Satan: We're going to have to deal with her eventually.

God: Yeah, I know, just not today. Now be quiet.

I cannot remember one holiday or special occasion when my mother was not sick or injured. She did not attend my first communion, confirmation or graduation from either grammar school or high school due to (pick one) a fall, the flu, a hernia, ulcers or a migraine. I'm pretty sure she was there when I was born, but that was probably the first and last time she put in an appearance.

Mom was not beyond manipulating a situation to suit her needs. If she was not getting enough attention (I never discovered the definition of enough), she would put herself in danger to get the desired results. I have visions of her standing naked and wet from the shower in front of the open freezer. Teeth chattering and icicles hanging from… well, use your imagination. Until she retired at the age of 70, she worked in an embroidery factory doing the mending. More often than not, she sewed her fingers to the fabric because band-aids full of blood were sure to be noticed.

My mother was a great actress. She had everyone convinced that she was just a sweet little old lady who wanted nothing more than to be healthy and spend time with her family. The truth was she was narcissistic with little interest in anyone but herself. Accidents were a daily occurrence. There were so many incidents over the years I have lost track of them all. Each time she was hospitalized, my sister and I informed the doctors and nurses of her penchant for self induced illness. They thought WE were crazy.

Munchausen's Syndrome, from which mom suffered, is not easily diagnosed. Did it kill her? Yes and no. Yes, because she used her high blood pressure as a means of getting attention -- under medicating and over medicating -- as the whim hit her. No, because the real villain here is World War I.

When the war broke out, mom was just about four years old. She lived with her parents and siblings near the Austrian border in a town surrounded by orchards and farmland. One night, Italian soldiers invaded and force-marched all the citizens on a long journey into Germany, where they were imprisoned in an internment camp. Living conditions in the camp were poor and there was little food. People were focused on staying alive any way they could. The only time anyone was given special attention was when he or she was sick.

My mother was a beautiful precocious child. The soldiers adored her and would often give her extra bread and rations for the family. Without those extras, my grandmother was forced to scavenge in the garbage for vegetable peels and rinds to make soup. Unfortunately, what mom took away from that experience was that she was special and that her needs were the only ones that mattered. If she didn't get what she wanted, she got sick. That was her modus operandi all her life.

The passing of a loved one is not funny, but in this case, death was a release for everyone... my mother, my sister and me. Although the internment camp gates were eventually unlocked and the people released, mom never escaped the jailer that held her heart captive. Ninety-six years is a long time for anyone to live. That is something to celebrate. What I mourn is the death of the dream in which Mom realizes we love her and, more importantly, that she loves us in return.

As for God and Satan -- I'm pretty sure the battle over ownership of mom's soul is still raging. At first, I thought it might be decided by a game of odds and evens, but knowing Mom, she would demand something more worthy of her personality and spirit.

Interior/Heaven: God and Satan in a heated game of hot potato with mom's soul

God: You take her.

Satan: NO! YOU take her.

God: I don't want her.

Satan: Well, I don't want her.

God: You're better with these kinds of souls.

Satan: Wait a minute. YOU created her in YOUR image and likeness. Remember?

My mother had Munchausen's disease and I was sick (at heart) from it.

Somehow the clear blue skies and crisp, clean air that were a welcome gift from Mother Nature Saturday morning seemed an affront to me as I made my way from the parking lot of (former) Loehmann's Plaza to the PGA Cinema Six. Behind the double glass entrance doors, members of the Human Trafficking Coalition of the Palm Beaches were hosting a fundraiser and, considering the heinous nature of this crime, I thought dark clouds and angry lightening would have been more in keeping with their goals.

Instead, very upbeat and positive minded people greeted supporters, who had come to see the Liam Neeson movie, Taken. This well-acted and well written film puts a human face on a problem that, for many citizens, is nothing more than a headline in their daily paper or on the evening news. Truth be told, human trafficking, like many crimes that target women, doesn't get anywhere near the publicity it deserves… and needs… if we are to raise awareness and prosecute offenders.

Although an advocate for women's rights, what brought me to the theater was not the cause itself but rather a chance encounter with one of the organization's energizer bunnies, Liisa Spinello. While out to dinner with my family a week ago, a familiar voice greeted our arrival at Miller's Ale House. Liisa slid into the booth next to my husband and, with her usual enthusiasm, told us about Saturday's event. She could have told us that the cost of admission was to swim around Peanut Island wearing ankle weights, and we still would have been there. You see, Liisa works in the Palm Beach County Victim Services and Rape Crisis Center and, four years ago when my daughter was sexually assaulted, hers was one of the hands we held through the dark days and nights of emotional healing. There is nothing my family wouldn't do for her and all the wonderful women who support local crime victims.

Before the show began, Susan Larsen, the Chair of the Human Trafficking Coalition, expressed sincere thanks to those in attendance for their support. She then introduced two gifted singers who also happen to be members of her team. Terry Crossen and Helene Hvizd sang a song written by Terry entitled, "Voiceless." The aptly titled song's lyrics say more about the plight of victims of human trafficking than I ever could:

They sold my body like they owned me
That served to make my spirit grow
My heart ached for freedom
I never let them sell my soul

The Human Trafficking Coalition of the Palm Beaches* meets the second Wednesday of every month at the Emergency Operations Center on Military Trail @ 10 am. Please join. Only by our efforts will the "Voiceless" be heard.

*Every community has an organization like the one in Palm Beach County. Wherever you live, you can make a difference.

For those of you who believe being held accountable for your actions infringes on your personal liberties, you may soon be getting national recognition in the form of burning one very recognizable clown in effigy (figuratively - maybe).

Corporate Accountability International, a non-profit that claims "challenging abuse, protecting people" is their mission, yesterday sponsored a National Day of Action to retire Ronald McDonald. Their goal is to end the fast food giant's marketing campaign that uses the red wigged, over-size shoed icon to advertise Big Macs and fries. Actually, their aim is to stop Ron (we're on a first name basis) from pushing Happy Meals on kids whose parents don't have a grasp of parental lingo – specifically the use of the word "No."

As part of CAI's Value the Meal push to hold fast food corporations accountable for children's health and obesity problems, they encouraged people to pressure McDonald's by calling the corporate office and requesting to speak with CEO, Jim Skinner. Although the chance of actually getting through to Mr. Skinner was equivalent to winning the lottery in all fifty states on the same day, a prepared speech was provided, to wit:

"I'm calling because our kids are sick. The national epidemic of diet-related disease puts our children's health and lives at stake.

McDonald's spends millions of dollars marketing its unhealthy products directly to kids, knowing full well that young children are particularly vulnerable to the manipulations of marketing.

Ronald McDonald is one of the most recognized and effective children's marketing icons in history, hooking kids on unhealthy food and spurring a deadly epidemic of diet-related disease.

Recently, Mr. Skinner said there is "no way" that McDonald's will retire Ronald. We are calling to urge him to listen to the concerns of the public, put kids' health first, and Retire Ronald."

I'm thinking their efforts fell on deaf ears. McDonald's will barely feel the "bite" to their corporate earnings should litigation ensue. (Interesting that Burger King mascot – The King – is not getting equal attention. Could it be that his creepy oversized plastic countenance deters sales of Whoppers? Nah!)

In June of last year, the Center for Science in the Public Interest, a consumer advocacy group based in Washington, D.C., also claimed that McDonald's advertisements for Happy Meals "unfairly and deceptively" enticed children to whine and beg until their parents drove them under the golden arches and bought them a high caloric, low nutrient meal. The Center threatened to sue (litigation pending) because using The Clown for "… marketing has the effect of conscripting America's children into an unpaid drone army of word-of-mouth marketers, causing them to nag their parents to bring them to McDonald's."

What about the clueless parents who seem unable to control the drones in their care? Nowhere in their publicly issued statements did the CSPI acknowledge that the blame must be shared and, in reality, weighs more heavily on the side of the individuals paying for those meals.

McDonald's, Burger King and other fast food restaurants make no bones about the fact that they want to sell lots of burgers and fries. However, neither the King nor the Clown are holding a gun to anyone's head and forcing them to eat the fat laden food they offer.

"Open your mouth and take a bite! Chew! Now swallow, or I'll blow your brains out!"

I don't think so.

Where children are concerned, parents are the final, definitive decision makers on whether a grilled chicken breast and baked potato or two greasy all beef patties, special sauce… constitute the evening meal. Sadly, too many parents have abdicated their responsibility and adopted the easy way out. Cooking takes time and effort. Why bother when some guy/gal with a chirpy voice and wearing a cute visor will just hand you a meal through a window in exchange for a few bucks. Mom and dad don't even have to get out of their car.

I suppose the next law suit will be against the company that designs the playgrounds attached to most fast food restaurants because they, too, entice children to be – well, children.

Sarah Parsons, the author of the change.org article wrote:

Some folks argue that it's parents' responsibility to police what their kids' eat. And these people are right — the onus is and should be on parents. But let's be real: Parenting is an incredibly difficult job — possibly the hardest task there is. When fast food companies use shiny, new toys or lovable clowns to pimp out their unhealthy kids' meals, it makes parenting exceedingly more difficult.

My response to her, "No, duh!!!!!" Of course parenting is hard work. It is also the most fulfilling job anyone can "choose" to do. Being responsible for the growth and development of another human being – mentally, emotionally and physically – is akin to playing god.

Instead of abdicating our parental position to another group of "it's not my fault" do gooders, why not wear the mantle of responsibility that being a mother or father demands. Try saying "No" to your kids. Spice it up a bit from time to time. The word is easy in every language known to man – nyet/nein/nee/nao/etc.

Once we improve our language skills, we can move on to other important issues. A National Day of Getting a Grip on Common Sense might be a good place to begin. Anyone interested in starting a petition?

Sometimes you'll have setbacks Sometimes things just go wrong Sometimes you don't feel well Sometimes you feel you can't go on. Well no matter what happens No matter how hard it seems If your still breathing then remember You have a chance to redeem.

We all have times in our lives When we need a helping hand. The car stalls out It's in the middle of the road An you just caused a traffic jam. Most of the people will just get mad. They yell things like go to hell. Wouldn't it be so much better

I reach out to the Heavens Underneath a Moon Light sky I dream of better days I dream of life and questions why. I've wonder for so long Why I've never felt alone When I'm all by myself Because no-one else is home. I've been alone in crowded rooms

Despite the very chilly temperatures in Florida at the moment, only a few short months remain before our newspaper headlines will again be reporting the deaths of infants and children left in car seats by "forgetful" parents and caregivers. You might question why I am embracing such a negative attitude so early in the year rather than assuming that the lessons of last summer have been learned. My reasons are simple.

Since 1998, when statistics were first recorded, about 450 youngsters locked in cars have died from hyperthermia.

In tests where outside temperatures registered 80 degrees, a vehicle's inside temperature rose quickly -- on average 19 degrees in ten minutes. Soon the thermostat registered 130 degrees or more. For someone trapped inside, breathing would become labored and, eventually, impossible. Death follows.

The national average for car deaths is approximately thirty-seven. In 2009, the number actually declined to thirty-three. Then, last January, something changed – and not for the better.

According to Kids and Cars, a Kansas based organization which tracks car deaths, forty-eight children died of hyperthermia in 2010. As we have already seen record cold temperatures across the country, it stands to reason that the coming summer months will herald record heat as well. My greatest fear is that as the thermostat rises so will the numbers of infant deaths. Experts are at a loss to explain why; but one thing they know, the weather is not solely responsible.

In August 2010, every major media outlet reported the sad story of 2-year-old Haile Brockington. Haile attended Katie's Kids Learning Center in Delray Beach, Florida. On the morning of August 5th, the school bus driver to whom she had been entrusted failed to make the obligatory check of the van after all the children had exited the vehicle. Haile was still in her seat five hours later when the driver returned. Needless to say, she was dead.

I wish that Haile's death was an isolated incident, but it wasn't. In 2009 and 2010 Palm Beach County Rescue received 450 and 249 calls relating to similar situations.

My reason for referencing that story is that Amanda Inman, the van driver, is presently on trial for manslaughter, and her lawyer is arguing that she (Inman) is as much a victim as young Haile. Attorney Andrew DeGraffenreidt claims that Inman never received adequate training from her supervisors at Katy's Kids nor did she receive any help from co-workers on the morning of the incident. Inman, DeGraffenreidt stated, was "distracted" by the group of mixed age kids she was transporting. State rules require that two employees visually inspect any vehicle when children enter or exit and that a passenger log be maintained for every trip. The regulation is more than sensible and should be the natural course of action for anyone responsible for child safety.

Immediately after the report of Haile's death hit the media, the Associate Press released an article entitled, "Record number of children die in hot vehicles in 2010." The topic caused a great deal of debate among the paper's readership. A number of people related similar incidents that had been in the news and some made excuses (including the "distraction" defense) for the parents, grandparents and assorted adults who had been negligent in protecting the innocents in their charge. Reading back over those comments, I am as angry today as I was when they first appeared.

Excuses? There are no excuses – no viable reasons -- for forgetting a child – not in a car, a bus, a playground, a bathroom – nowhere, never ever! More than one parent blamed a "change of routine" for causing their lapse of memory….a father who did not normally take his child to daycare and a soon-to-be bride who was preoccupied with second wedding plans. As the mother of two now grown children, I can tell you there is nothing "routine" about parenting and childcare. Expect the unexpected should be every mother and father's motto.

As a Florida resident, it saddened me to learn that my state ranked second in the nation (Texas was first) in the number of vehicle deaths reported. Entering my car at the end of the business day, I often feel that I am stepping into an oven. When I think of the children who died while locked inside a vehicle for hours, I am horrified.

People, not just parents, have become distracted by the struggle to survive. The slackened economy, with its threat of job and housing loses, is like the Sword of Damocles hanging over everyone's head. We go through our days lost in a fog of worry and fear. However, there are degrees of fear, and it's time that we began fearing the loss what is most important – the lives of our children.

I am hoping to be proven wrong – very, very wrong – and that the lessons of last summer have, indeed, been learned. It is sad enough when children die due to war, civil unrest, disease and the ever-growing abuse of minors. To see their names etched on granite headstones because someone "forgot" them is too horrifying to imagine on this cold January day.

When you where born your parents gave you a garden They planted a special seed called love in your heart They gave you a light called sunshine to always help it grow They made it to last a lifetime and gave it energy to spare They nurtured it through hugs

I'm starting the year off right With me and my lovely wife No vow to quit smoking So nobody choking The life from each other tonight. I'm starting the year off right No vow to loss weight on this night I'll eat what I want and as much as I want

Welcome to the New Year Did you make a promise yet? I make the same one each year I haven't broken it yet. Some will say to quit smoking While with others it's to loose weight. Some will vow to be nicer Which is a very good vow to make.

To the Soldier, the Doctor, The Fire Fighter, and Cop The Lawyer, The Cab Driver, The Bus Driver, and Nurse The Son, the Brother, the Uncle, The Father The Daughter, the Mother, the Niece, and the Sister The Fighters, The Warriors, and ones who will save us

As the snow falls outside I sit here by the fireplace I watch the flames climb higher The smoke curls into space I think about this Christmas I smile with thoughts that cheer Maybe it's only daydreaming But there my dreams for the year

While I must admit this has taken awhile to write I can't help but smile at the finish. Some of the best duets in the world have been comedy groups and after going through hours of the best I'm still laughing.

Some moments in life are special You know them when it starts The moment before a first kiss The pounding of your heart The day your child is born The first time you hold their hand Some moments in life are special They stay with you in your heart

I meet a true friend this year Not always easy to do A true friendship last forever They stand by you through and through Their there when times get ruff There their to laugh with you to When you need a shoulder to cry on

Ok, so I have no idea how new a protocol or procedure is or is not, but I had never encountered it before, and neither had my family.

I had elbow surgery this morning to replace a ligament I tore 2 years ago when I broke and dislocated this elbow. Surgery went fine, by the way. When I have had surgeries before, I was always put under general anesthesia. Not this time. This time they gave me some kind of nerve block that numbed me from my shoulder down, and I was sedated. I remember them telling me they were going to take me back, and the next thing I remember I was waking up from the surgery and being moved to recovery. The benefit of this, my doctor told me, is that there is less risk of nausea from the nerve block and sedative than there is from the anesthesia. Just guessing here, but I am guessing that is not the only side effect there is a reduced risk of.

I am not used to this sensation of my arm being completely numb. I was told it would take anywhere from 8-18 hours for the nerve block to wear off completely. It's been about 14 hours since they numbed my arm and I have not yet gotten feeling back in my arm, though I have started to. It has felt like pins and needles in my hand for a few hours now, very similar to the sensation of your foot going to sleep. And I have started to be able to move my fingers again - the weird thing there is that I can move my fingers, I can see them move, but I can't feel them moving. Weird. On the positive side, my elbow has not hurt at all today from the surgery. :-)

All in all, this has been a rather different procedure for me, but I think overall I approve. I spent very little time in recovery - maybe 30 minutes. Then I got to go home, which is much better than being at the hospital. I have had no nausea. Just this dead weight, numb arm all day, and even that numbness has started to wear off. Hmm, guess that means I'll be starting the pain pills soon...

Yesterday, the White House issued one of those -- eek! -- regulations. As part of implementing the health reform law, our federal government established a new rule to stop profiteering by private health insurance companies.

As the AP reported, the regulation "calls for insurance companies to spend at least 80 cents of the premium dollar on medical care and quality.

Thanksgiving day is here at last Time for family, food, and fun So have a Happy Holiday Each and every One youtube.com/watch?v=YoXj1WCfn8A Happy Holidays song by the Whispers

Hello my friends and the newly acquainted with my writing. I've been doing a lot of poems lately and this week is still a poem but a different kind from what I would normally write. This week it's pure music.

Non-Vegetarian food on almost every occasion is bound to stir up passions and heated arguments as to why it is not good for the health as well as the planet.

The time is almost here It's not to far away For all of us to give Thanks This Thanksgiving Day It's time to be with loved ones And friends from far away The reasons to be Thankful This Thanksgiving Day Be grateful for your family

I have been having a rough couple days. My Fibromyalgia is flared up big time, so I'm hurting more than normal and it drives me nuts. However, I noticed that one thing that makes me happier and distracts me from my pain, is the unconditional love I get from my pets.

I've tried to live a life that's nobel Each day I do my best Life has tested me so much Sometimes I just wish to rest We have known you'd be here for sometime Last week you came at last Your one more reason to live my life From this day forever more

Most patients don't ask to see their records; most patients don't take their drugs as prescribed; most patients don't research their treatment options (though most seem to use the Internet); indeed many patients don't actually do what their doctors advise at all.

Of course, gays and other anti-man forces will vehemently deny this. They will claim that there is no pressure on straight males to be heterosexual, and that sexuality is ingrained and fixed and not taught and people do not consciously change or limit the flow of their sexual desires ... but that is all invalid ... of course, gays (i.e. effeminate males who like men exclusively), do experience it, but its an experience particular to these non-men who like men, because they fit into the heterosexual set up snuggly (of manhood=heterosexuality; and Queerhood=homosexuality).

This article from a western source, does hint at this pressure/ conditioning to be heterosexual, which both gays and other anti-man forces refuse to acknowledge, because of their vested interests.

Every Day above ground is a good one This you know is true Each day can bring new hope A new cure for what's wrong with you So if tomorrow you wake and your blind in one eye You find a leg missing too The day is still a good one

Conservatives these days...... What they are thinking?

As a child I learned this lesson It's stayed with me all my life You may not get it there and then It might not be next week You'll get it when you need it most It will come in time you see I can't say why I can't say how

I know the above statement leaves me vulnerable to crude sex jokes, but it's not exactly funny. I definitely have an over-active gag reflex and perhaps may even have something called dysphagia.

Going by the ancient Hindu scriptures and manuscripts, Kundalini Yoga is believed to have transcended all other forms of yoga.

Working can be difficult when you have a learning disability because you have to deal with impatient people who doubt your abilities. I was faced with that situation at work last night.

You must think me feeble minded Maybe you think me a twit Someone who just takes advantage Of all the little things you give. You give of your time You give of your heart You take the time each day To take care of all the little things

I was in a department store on Saturday when I happened to come across the old-fashioned red Radio Flyer wagon (now made of plastic!) , which didn't bother me as much as the fact that it was equipped with seatbelts!

"What is happiness?" is one of those strange questions philosophers ask, and it's hard to answer. Philosophy, as a discipline, doesn't agree about it. Philosophers are a contentious, disagreeable, lot by nature and training. But the question's hard because of a problematic prejudice about what kind of thing happiness might be. I'd like to diagnose the mistake and prescribe a corrective.

Is it any wonder When I'm with you I smile so easily Is it any wonder With you my words come by freely Is it any wonder When I walk with you at night the stars shine so much brighter Is it any wonder When I'm with you my heart feels so much lighter

Several years ago, while teaching English at a community college, I asked a group of students to write their obituaries. Initially, they were shocked by the assignment, but when I explained that its purpose was to inspire them to become bolder in their lives and braver with their dreams, they warmed up to the idea. "Our most important creation is ourselves," I said. "Every moment our life stories are being written whether we write them or not. So why not take up your pen? Why not make your story into the story you want?"

If Dixie visits you, you don't want her to sit down. That's how this beagle-Jack Russell terrier mix shows her handler that she's found live bedbugs.

The bedbug menace is growing in homes, hospitals, movie theaters and hotels around the country — and the pests are becoming resistant to many treatments.

So to get rid of them, exterminators and desperate families are going to extreme lengths — some of them creative and harmless, and others that are more dangerous than the insects.

WASHINGTON (AP) — American scientists deliberately infected prisoners and patients in a mental hospital in Guatemala with syphilis 60 years ago, a recently unearthed experiment that prompted U.S. officials to apologize Friday and declare outrage over "such reprehensible research."
The U.S. government-funded experiment, which ran from 1946 to 1948, was discovered by a Wellesley College medical historian. It apparently was conducted to test whether penicillin, then relatively new, could prevent infection with sexually transmitted diseases. The study came up with no useful information and was hidden for decades.
Two members of President Barack Obama's Cabinet apologized to the Guatemalan government for the tests, and the White House press secretary, Robert Gibbs, said the medical experimentation was "shocking, it's tragic, it's reprehensible."
Obama telephoned Guatemalan President Alvaro Colon to apologize personally.
The government researcher who led the work in Guatemala also was involved in this country's infamous Tuskegee experiment, where from 1932 to 1972 scientists tracked 600 black men in Alabama who had syphilis but did not know it, without ever offering them treatment.

Today is gonna be my day I'm gonna get that fish I've been planning this for months now It's like my birthday wish. Since May I've tracked your movements I know your favorite food I know that you will be here Today your your mine to rule.

The Corn Refiners Assn. petitions the Food and Drug Administration to rename the much-maligned sweetener 'corn sugar.'

Much in the same way that troubled companies change names to improve their reputations, the Corn Refiners Assn. is trying to do away with high-fructose corn syrup.

Not the product. Just its moniker.

God I am pathetic... It seems I'll grasp at anything to get my immobilized self to start moving my brain and fingers again. It is pathetic that the only place I feel at home is this incendiary site where I frequently leave sparks in the cyber sky like a meteor entering the atmosphere.....on fire. Yet here it seems is the only place my words find a place to rest. I need to write like I need to eat, to survive. I always thought I would be choosy where my words were printed, but LOL, so just as my predecessors have always done….give me a spot to place the words that Maybe read[ or not] and I am happy to toss my battered and bloodied ego to the wind and write something even if it sucks.

OK, so grasping at my only new straw here and it is the fact I am moving into the realm of "morbidly Obese"… as this 'male' doctor had the cheek to diagnose me, recently. I had to laugh, as his definition is anyone 20 lbs or more over their ideal weight.

That weight being calculated by a gaggle of manic-depressives, on legal speed, lacking earned self esteem and a latent hatred of food, fed to them by their poor mothers, who tried to force healthy food into them ,so as to keep them alive..Twiggy, being their role model..... Ah yes, this specimen of humanity was a young-ish -man [to my 70 year old eyes] and looks like he had just emerged from a deprivation holding tank. He had the pallor of light grey/blue around the edges...drk circles ringed a pair of watery blue eyes. Eyes reflecting some basic caring for his fellow person, [I am being fair here]...He tells me I am in his 12% failure rate for gastric stapling. Yah, think about it ....I actually let a gaggle of educated morons cut into my body and staple my stomach to the size of a walnut. Yep ,I did that, after a adult lifetime of fighting the bulge. If I am within the 12 percent, ,then I personally know each and every one of them

SO,, being the corpulent, being that I appear to be,…I am basically healthy. By that I mean, NO hypertension 128/86, All my HDL’S and LDL’s appear to remain in the 5 to 1 ratio where they are medially supposed to be at, aside from the arthritis family disabilities I inherited ….[which is enough on my plate, just a little funny there] .

To the dismay of Modern Medicine. It appears I may live to see my 100^th birthday…Even my recent “Upper and Downer” ,Colonoscopy and whatever they call the tube down the throat to check my walnut stomach, everything appears in super shape, no breast cancer, no colon cancer, no heart disease,,no plaque in my arteries…..I’d say I was pretty healthy, as opposed to a fit specimen like “Jim Fixx, who died in his running shoes at a trim 139 lbs……from a massive coronary!

WHOO- RA!.

So he has his heart felt eyes locked on mine [and I listened with a tight grasp on my flip lip]......as he explained to me what a healthy diet really consisted of...I will not bore you with ‘the diet’, but let me say, you could put the whole daily ration in a 4x6x3 cardboard box, excluding the 32 oz's of fluid...that’s not counting MY elixir of the God's....[.wine or spirits]. OK. I will agree I might fit some of my most favorite food items in that box, defying physics I could load that sucker with an easy 25,000 calories BUT the elixir is Mandatory, for me, not him!!”....A failure in his stats! I almost felt giddy. If he only knew the ‘organic secrets’ I held, he might burst a brain vessel....when he added in the spirits, he'd seize up.

BUT...I put on my good face and "looked the Doc .in the eye' and tried to feel remorse.

While I conjured up in my mind;

how would the nice fellow on the Vine …who told me, he reveled in his diagnosis as a Sociopath, as he explained to me he'd like to” EAT me”, like IN Hannibal Lector…feel?..

How would I taste and would I give him High Cholesterol LOL…I’m thinking as I tried to put on that remorseful face..I must have succeeded OR……t he Doc. smiled and hoped I was not smart enough or mad enough to call a mal-practice atty. and sue his ass....for a professional "old fashioned snake oil" con artist..that he was………....Take the money and run.......leaving me with a walnut stomach and still morbidly obese. .

Well I may be a bit cynical and I know there are those fellows on the Vine who think me verbose AND a whiner, but I do understand I need to expel some of this cynicism and verboseness and whine on the Vine….It is what keeps those BAD stats down that will kill me……I also realized I needed to find a way to eat and not be buried in a piano crate. I hate exercise. If you label it some kind of yuppie health gym, with a personal trainer, willing to beat me into submission...with my voluntary consent, I have to pass. I do eat healthy, I do walk, I do still garden and clean my own home….Yahee for me and to add to this year’s forward health march, I bought a Vita mixer….to compete with my buddy Augur’s juicer…….Yes, and I have to tell one and all I have eaten more vegetables, and fruits, whole and raw, in the last two months,than in my entire lifetime prior to now….Guess what? I managed to gain 4 ½ lbs….Yahee, for the Vita mixer….now I am healthier and fatter.

What? You don’t believe me…….shame on you.

I am a cancer fighter/survivor. I've been living under the shadow of this disease for 20 years, and I'm still fighting to this day.

An estimated 20,000 deaths from some form of cancer occur worldwide every single DAY. 100% of the proceeds from this event will go to collaborative cancer research, working towards better treatments, earlier detection. and a better chance of survival for all kinds of cancers.

Anyone can go to the website and donate, no matter where you live.

We are all at risk. The life you help save could be your parent's, your partner's, your child's, or your own.

.This has been a very bad year. As I sat at my computer thinking and reading the thoughts of others, I realized how much I really didn't give a rats ass about anything. Wow, it really hit me hard. I had some emotional issues in my 20's and took my delivered dose of Med's and therapy. Actually took Paxil for so many years , until one day I thought screw it. If I am going to be a nut job, so be it. I have to say I did not totally run amok....some of you out there might disagree....lolrotf. BUT I did manage to find a common ground in life where I realized @!$%# happens and no one promised me a rose garden.

I finally became OK with my core values and decided to just let the flack fall where it may. I was way to old to be held hostage by my own indecision's about who and what I was AND MAYBE ,WHAT I WAS, REALLY ABOUT, was OK. So I sort that out and I still feel like crap. Then I remember my old long time friend , Fibromyalgia. I have had it so many years it seems like I forgot I had it. Life was just a world of one kind of pain,or another. I thought that just was what being alive meant. I have Ostio-Arthritis so bad my hands look like a Bonsai Tree. I drop every other thing I grab and it seems life is a succession of bending my corpulent self over, every other time I grab something , as it falls right through my grasp.The Arthur is so bad, made the Fibro float away so far, the grey cells forgot to remember my old friend.

It hit me last spring that my neighbor across the street...my age, seemed to always be bragging about still climbing a ladder to clean her gutters...she is like a Gad-fly. She flits here and there and preens her slim,nimble body like a Peacock....{male,that is] Me I hobble here and I hobble there, I am jealous. That bothers me also. See I am one of the old hold outs that believes in GOD. It took allot of meditation to not be really, really, pissed at Him. It has seemed He has heaped and inordinately large amount of "CRAP" on my plate. Then I see the Gad-Fly and boy that can do it for me....bummmerrrrrrrrrrrr. If I see her up on the roof I have to restrain my self from wishing she'd fall off. One day she did, fall off the ladder into a gopher hole....Well that did it...Now I have to listen to how much pain she is in because she "strained a muscle" in her back. So I made a deal with God..... I'll never wish for her to fall off the roof,if He just shuts her up! OK , I got side tracked.

Fibromyalgia....well in 1970,when I was diagnosed...possibly Lupus at the university of Oregon Medical School, I sort of did the Ostrich thing and thought if I was going to live a long and full life I had to "FORGET ABOUT IT". I soon found there was no-one remotely interested in the fact that I had A LITTLE PAIN. Where? every where, "Yah,right" they'd say. I even had a doctor once actually say to me,when I listed it as a presenting condition...."You mean, there really IS a real medical condition called,Fibro....what"? I thought it was just a bunch of whiners!!!!! I resisted kicking him in his crotch and asking him to whine for me.

So my fellow Fibromyalgia sufferers....that is a word right? It does not get any better. It does not go away. In fact it is worse. It makes me depressed even on a good day,when my brain says,"Hi World,lets dance"....It is a sneaky,@!$%#ty,not fair illness and so every day NOW....I take the pain meds..."how addicted can a 70 yr old woman get and who cares anywayJust give me the drugs and let me live a quasi normal life,even if it is not on a ladder...( I offered to take her up on her offer to clean my gutters) me bad! I even ordered up my "medical Tobacco" card as my grandson calls it....There have to be some perks to off set the down side, right?

Did I have a point when I started? I do not know. Maybe you all do not care.... It could be the pain meds,

all-time-ers/old-time-ers, dementia, or just plain OLD....but who gives a rip anyway....Have a good one, one and all.

Popcorn?

"California is in the midst of its worst outbreak of whooping cough in a half-century. More than 2,700 cases have been reported so far this year — eight times last year's number at this point. Seven of the victims, all infants, have died.

And here's what really worries pediatricians like USC's Harvey Karp: Doctors thought they wiped out whooping cough when they developed vaccines decades ago.

The disease hits young children hardest, especially ones who are not vaccinated or who have not yet built up full immunity. The prescribed vaccination regimen begins with a shot at two months and continues until children are 5 years old. For many children, it can take that long for complete immunity to develop — and until then, they're vulnerable."

People with type 1 diabetes must keep a careful eye on their blood glucose levels: Too much sugar can damage organs, while too little deprives the body of necessary fuel. Most patients must prick their fingers several times a day to draw blood for testing.

To minimize that pain and inconvenience, researchers at MIT's Spectroscopy Laboratory are working on a noninvasive way to measure blood glucose levels using light.

ATLANTA -- A rare U.S. outbreak of typhoid fever has been linked to a frozen tropical fruit product used to make smoothies, health officials reported Thursday.
Seven cases have been confirmed - three in California and four in Nevada. Two more California cases are being investigated. Five people were hospitalized, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention said.
The CDC said five of the victims drank milkshakes or smoothies made with frozen mamey (ma-MAY') fruit pulp. Four of them used pulp sold by Goya Foods Inc. of Secaucus, N.J.

In a nutshell: Through a natural need to belong, but feeling unwanted, excluded and undervalued.

A sense of belonging dictates our level of confidence. Try as we might, we cannot function without others as we are social beings. From the moment we are born and bond with our parents, we begin the social cycle of inclusion: in family, relatives, schools, friends, relationships, associations and work. There is no escaping others because they validate our existence and reinforce our culture and identity. Others act as mirrors which reflect our presence. When this reflection is confusing, or does not match with our own self perception, it leads to isolation or an identity crisis.

Other people's attention, recognition, praise, affection and love are lifelines to our endeavours, reinforcing who we are and giving us the purpose to continue with our lives. When others we care about reject us, we are likely to reject ourselves too, internalise the hate and spew it back on the family and community in the form of deviant, selfish behaviour. Most juvenile and adult problems are caused by a deep sense of not belonging to anyone or anything. Such people are most likely to have experienced rejection of some sort in childhood or in a relationship which leaves them with a sense of isolation, probably a desire to be destructive and a feeling of not having anyone on their side who really cares about them or their future.

For example, this bright, but sensitive, young 14-year-old girl was always being called nasty, hurtful names because of her surname. She had a terribly low opinion of herself and didn't see herself advancing far, despite her abilities. Having being picked on constantly, she felt 'unloved' and 'lonely' and wanted to leave school as soon as she could. She saw the greatest event in her life as 'getting married to a nice guy who loves me as I am'.

Lack of Affirmation
Her peers' cruel behaviour did not affirm who she was so she had begun to reject herself too, rating herself very low in esteem and refusing to acknowledge that her surname had little to do with her looks or talent, or that she could still be anything she wanted. As the social mirror did not reflect her self-perception, she was very hurt and began to reject her schoolwork, precipitating her steady decline. This girl's negative feelings came as no surprise but they are disturbing. At this age, the friendship of her peers and being considered 'one of the gang' are very important in her development. If she is continually teased and rejected it makes it difficult for her to appreciate herself and her potential or to recognise herself as someone worthy of respect and love, especially at this important transitional phase when she is moving from childhood to adulthood.

In fact, one of our worst emotions come from a sense of total rejection by those whom we care about most, hence the traumatic effect of any broken relationship which is not mutual. The sense of not belonging is very obvious when a relationship breaks. The loss of a partner is an immediate loss of self-esteem. We suddenly cease to be attractive in our own eyes, not caring about anything for a while. We become non-persons whose value has dramatically fallen. Yet we would still be very desirable to an awful lot of other people. At these times, it is pointless telling someone to 'snap out of it' or that 'things will get better'. Their sense of exclusion and lack of belonging mean that they cannot see what well meaning advisers can! They have to go through a painful period of denial, anger, acknowledgement, acquiescence and finally full acceptance of their situation before they can begin to come to terms with the loss and rebuild their self-esteem.

Some people never reach this final stage of acceptance and remain bitter and vengeful for years. They cling to the past because the memories and sense of rejection are so painful they are often difficult to relinquish. The present means little to them because the past remains unresolved. By hanging on to the pain, as hurtful as it might be, they still have a 'cause', a status and a 'good reason' to do nothing to change their situation. However, along the way they lose their sense of purpose in relentless negativity, they loss their confidence and self worth and they create an emotional void which gradually affects their capacity to develop truly positive relationships or trust in others.

Anxious and Isolated
A sense of not belonging, especially with those who matter to us, destroys our confidence utterly because it is the reactions of others which moulds, confirms and maintains our self-image. Who we are and where we belong are dictated by our cultural history, individual background and significant others around us and when they cease to care, so do we, which has the biggest effect on our personal value. If our loved ones do not share our perspectives, hopes or aspirations, we become more anxious, isolated and unproductive. We cannot achieve our potential because our ambition disappears too.

A sense of belonging to someone or something is therefore our greatest need. We identify a niche for ourselves, according to the roles of those around us, and take on that persona. That is why two people cannot occupy exactly the same position in any family, friendship or work unit because a sense of belonging depends on individual uniqueness. There would be problems of social and personal identity. Our own confidence is controlled by this feeling of belonging because most of our actions are geared to align with, or to disrupt, our environment, depending on our sense of security. If it is strong because we feel wanted, there are fewer hang ups, as we feel less threatened by others. If it is weak, we are plagued by insecurity and find it really hard to be positive. When we feel isolated, insecure or rejected, our self-esteem takes a nosedive.

Elaine Sihera(MsCYPRAH) 2010
Emotional Health Adviser
"Respect and love begin with the self. If we have none, how can we give away any?"

If you read the first part of this article then you will know that when we left off I had quit smoking over 12 times in more then a decade. In that time period my youngest daughter had taken up smoking and I had failed in my quitting attempts completely. A fine example of both a lack of will power and the kind of piss poor role model that leads their child, their baby girl, to a life of enslavement to their own addiction. Basically, nobody too frickin special. While I was struggling and failing a strange thing was happening at the fishing company I work for. People were quitting smoking, and staying quit, and walking around like it was no big deal. Four die hard smokers quit one after another and didn’t go back. When I asked them how they did it they told me that they read a book and that you read the book and when you are done you quit smoking.

It was by far the biggest bunch of bullsh!t I had ever heard in my life. I didn’t think there was anything a book could tell me that I pretty much didn’t already know about quitting and the dangers of smoking and all that. I of course dis-regarded the whole thing as hogwash. I had made my attempt to quit with Chantix and had started smoking again when one of the guys told me that I should read the book. I told him that it was pretty likely that I was not going to be able to quit, and I needed to quit-quitting for a while and just enjoy my smokes in peace. He told me that I didn’t have to quit, just read the book knowing what it said would help me whenever I decided to quit. One night on wheel watch I decided to give it a read and see what the hoopla was all about.

I opened the book at the start of a 3 hour watch. The first thing I read was this crazy author telling me that he was going to cure the world of smoking and how his wife thought he was crazy for trying to do it. I was thinking, “Me and your wife are on the same page buddy.” The book told me to smoke as much as I possibly could while reading it because when I finished the book I was going to quit smoking. I didn’t believe that either but I smoked and read the book thoughtfully and had to re-read some parts because I wanted to completely understand the material. Halfway through it I knew that it was true, ¾ of the way I knew that I was going to quit when I got done reading it. It took over 5 hours to read that book, right at the end it directed me to go ahead and have the last ciggarette of my life. I had that smoke and as soon as I put it out I knew I was a non-smoker. I destroyed my remaining packs of ciggarettes because I couldn’t give them away, not once I knew.

Afterward it was all gravy, no major cravings, no feeling like I was going to kill anybody (especially smug bastard non-smokers). It was way better than anytime I ever quit before. Since the moment I stopped I never felt like, “Gee I wish I could have one.” I never chewed gum or ate loads of candy, and I gained a little weight but not much. Having quit so many times before using methods that drag out the suffering over a period of months or even years. It was the most amazing thing and I would not be writing this right now if I didn’t believe that I am not special, anybody could read that book and quit like I did. I don’t have loads of will power, I am not better than a person who has been unable to quit. The purpose of this article is to tell you that you can do it, you can quit smoking if you want to.

So that said, the next questions should be why? How does it work? What could it possibly say? Since this article is partially book review and not an attempt to sell anybody anything I will tell you all I can about what it says. I hope my explanations are adequate cause I really want everybody to be able to understand as much as possible. If you remember in my last article I said that my big problem in quitting was that I held a lot of pre-concieved notions and mis-information about smoking. Well the ideas presented here are my interpretation of what I understand to be the truth of the matter. The truth about tobacco and it’s use and nicotine addiction and it’s effects. So here is a list of the principal ideas and I want you to know that reading them here is not a substitute for reading the book but may help anyway for somebody trying to quit.

The normal way of quitting smoking is to list the dis-advantages of smoking, and then to say, “If only I can go long enough without a ciggarette, eventually the desire to smoke will go. I can enjoy life again, free from the slavery of addiction.” It is very difficult to succede using this method for the following reasons:

Stopping smoking is not the real problem. You stop smoking every time you put one out. Your powerfull reasons to quit on day 1 may not hold the same power on day2 through day 10,000. All you need to do is slip up and have a ciggarette and then another one and you are back in the trap.
The health scares should stop us. No.... You smoke more when you are nervous, tell smokers ciggarettes are killing them and the first thing they do is light up. Cancer treatment centers always have lots of ciggarette butts outside of them.
All reasons for stopping make it harder for 2 reasons, first They Create A Sense of Sacrifice. We are always giving something up ( Our crutch, prop, vice, little friend ar how ever you see it) second They Create A “Blind,” We do not smoke because we don’t understand the reasons we should stop.

The book describes a new way of quitting. Initially to forget the reasons we’d like to stop, to face the ciggarette problem, and to ask ourselves the following questions.

What is it doing for me?
Do I actually enjoy it?
Do I really need to go through life paying through the nose just to stick these things in my mouth and suffocate myself.

I can only answer these briefly as I am not going to rewrite a book in an article.

Smoking does nothing for you. All of the attributes people give to it are all BS. Smoking alleviates discomfort associated with drug addiction and that is all. You think it relaxes you but all it is doing is relieving the stress that being addicted to it has caused. Everything smoking does for you is related to the fact that you are addicted to nicotine and therfore somewhat miserable because of it. Smoking alleviates that misery and re-ou inforces the idea that it is helping you out. It is not. Addiction causes all of the things that smoking solves. Think about it, were you miserable all of the time before you started smoking? How do you think non-smokers are able to deal with life if all of the things you have always thought about smoking are actually true. If you are a smoker the idea that smoking has no bebefit is a tremendous revelation.

Do I enjoy it? Enjoy always worrying about when you can have that next ciggarette? What is the most enjoyable ciggarette? The first one after you haven’t had one for a long time of course. Why? You are at your most miserable at that time. Think of being addicted to nicotine like wearing a pair of tight shoes. Having a ciggarette is like taking them off for a while. It feels so good to take off those tight shoes especially after they have been on for a long time. Would you say you enjoyed wearing them because it felt so good to take them off. Sadly because ciggarette smoking does nothing but alleviate the suffering of nicotine addiction enjoying being a smoker gets harder and harder to do over time.

Do you really need them? That is the fundamental question and as you learn more about the sad facts of how useless they really are to you, the answer heads decidedly towards no. No, you don’t need them. They aren’t doing a damn thing for you. If you weren’t suffering from addiction you could get the same benefits from ciggarette smoking as you would get from breathing automobile exhaust, same benefits. Nicotine addiction is a real bummer to live with and sooner or later every single smoker comes to the conclusion that they don’t want to do it anymore. When that time comes knowing the truth, that all the benefits obtained from ciggarette smoking are false is extremely helpfull in getting rid of this useless addiction.

You can be as happy as when you are having a ciggarette every moment of your life for the rest of your days. Without nicotine addiction you will be freed from the very things that you needed ciggarettes for. There is nothing to give up, there is no loss in stopping smoking, only gain. Freedom from having to worry about that next ciggarette, freedom from all of the negative things that go with smoking. You will breathe easier, feel better, and you need never miss being a smoker for even a second, because there is nothing to miss about being caught in a trap and not knowing that you can easily get out and need never look back.

A lot of people when they quit feel deprived and use all kinds of will power to quit because they believe they are giving something up and it makes them feel angry and empty inside. You don’t ever have to feel that way, once you know you are not giving up anything but sorrow and suffering. You will never feel the need to be mean or nasty to your fellow smokers. From personal experience I know for a fact that you will feel sorry for them and really just want to help. Who wouldn’t want to help their friends knowing that they have been lied to and enslaved by a bunch of ideas that are mostly passed on from person to person and are completely untrue. Free your mind from the lies (many of which are centuries old) and you can quit smoking like it was nothing, never regret your decision, never feel empty, deprived or agitated because you know that you aren’t missing a thing.
It is no mistake that people that quit in this way are happier about it than folks that quit using willpower and the regular method. The book isn’t a very big book the government could print a million copies and probably just about cure nicotine addiction. That would be bad for business however and they do love that tax revenue stream. I recommend the book my copy has cured 6 people of nicotine addiction and I am just borrowing it. It will move on and cure loads more I am sure.

The author has clinics in North America (offices and business all over the world) they do smoking cessation at those based on the ideas I just did my best to write about.

You don't have to take my word for it though there is a BIG WEBSITE and CELEBRITY TESTIMONIALS and everything.

The copy of the book I have makes it sound like a much smaller organization than what it is now. I guess when something works it works. They have a lot of options on those websites I am just a guy who read a borrowed book. I just wrote this in the hopes that anybody who reads it who feels like they can't quit, would find out that they can and if I can do it believe me anybody can. I hope this information gets to those who can use it.

PART1 ARTICLE

Just to cover some group posting obligations: Have a beer with your dog, while watching fox news, take a bunch of pictures of it and if you can write me a story and post it to my other articles comment link. If you could save any wildlife or the environment while doing that it would help to keep my story from getting deleted from any of my groups. Oh and don't forget to smoke a fish while your at it.

I am not financially, personally or in any way affiliated with the publishers or any other folks or the author or any of his subsidiaries. I am just a guy who quit smoking and wants to help others.

By Rita Rubin, USA TODAY

"The country's main professional group of obstetricians published "less restrictive" guidelines Wednesday that could lead to more vaginal births after C-sections, or VBACs.
"What the guidelines emphasize is that a trial of labor is a reasonable and appropriate alternative for many women with a prior cesarean delivery," says Jeffrey Ecker, a Harvard associate professor of obstetrics and gynecology who co-wrote the new guidelines from the American College of Obstetrics and Gynecology. That includes women with two previous C-sections and those carrying twins.

Ecker's comment echo those of a National Institutes of Health consensus conference panel, which in March called on organizations such as his to make it easier for women to try for VBACs."

Pictures of "Isolated Viruses" Debunked. What is HIV/AIDS really? This is shocking just shocking.

ARNPs are in my opinion the most overlooked health-care providers around. I have used them when available whenever I could, especially those in some form of independent practice.

I love them because they are thorough, they don't assume too much, and are willing to run the test and make certain they are prescribing the correct treatment. They do not tend to have that "GOD" thing going on, that unfortunately many doctors develop. An ARNP that I know says on a regular basis, "I could have been wrong, lets try something else and double check the test". Both Physical & Mental Health are blessed with good ARNPs.

They are also some of the worst administrators on earth, in my experience. Their offices often tell of their state of mind. They may most certainly know where everything is, but you will have to give them a moment to get their hands on it. "I will call in that medication no later than noon" real meaning..."you should be able to pick up the meds by tomorrow at the end of business. Aggravation at it's best.

But overall these professionals are, at least in my experience, more concerned about their patients health, and less about how many patients they can see in a half an hour.

Thanks ARNPs, start collecting your co-pays and hire someone to your filing!

Maddad

Yes that is the title to a Berlin song…
But hey it fit so well with the topic at hand,
That be sexual activity,
And the being that is Me.

Sex (I’m A Celibate Male)

Those that are in the know about such things, know that I’ve been content with a sexually austere lifestyle of a Warrior/Monk (kind of thingy) for about four years now. It is no big secret, I just got tired of the whole chasing sex dealio… learning Taoist Sexual Practices from an older hippy/witchy woman did not help matters. Yes, the Sharing Energy thing works, but Hellz-Bellz for this Viking an Orgasm without Ejaculation is just not quite the same as the natural way… but then we come to (no pun intended) the whole concept of “spilling life-force” in pursuit of a few seconds pleasure is pure folly, that thought resonates with me deeply.

I can only speak from personal experience that in the past 3 years I have had 7 physical altercations with guys… and not one was a big deal and easily handled.

Oh yeah, there is something to be said for being completely independent in decision making and also not worrying about hurting someone’s feelings because one wants to speak the truth about a subject, ect…

Sex (I’m A Horn Dog)

Hey, what can I say… I still have a pulse, By the Gods!
Oh and are there some Fine Women wandering around….

Legs, Butts, and Wiggling Hips,
Slut-Stamp Tats, Kissable Lips
Lets not forget… Belly-Button Rings
…These are a few of my favorite things.

Well I guess that covers “Horn Dog” - eh?

Sex (I’m A Tempted)

Yes I’m tempted - daily! As an example: I met a very sweet and alluring girl on a bus a few weeks ago… she is still rattling around in my brainbox. Funny, That!

Temptation pulling against a freely chosen path is silliness, no?
It is not if I took a Vow, or anything along those lines.

Sex (I’m A Still Waiting)

Yeah I’m going to wait for a powerful Warrior Woman to enter the scene… Nothing wrong with “civilian” women I suppose, I just want to share energy with a woman of equal power to myself. I know that is a fairly high threshold, but I am sure there are plenty of strong warrior women that are too much for a normal mortal males to handle… an extraordinary mortal - well, such as myself, is the best match for such a woman.

Seeking Women who can Feast, Fight, Fornicate, and Hunt - Must Love Dogs
That would be the money line in any personal add I would ever place.

It is hard to challenge medical facts and medical authority especially when matters of addressing cancer are concerned. I believe however, that too many influences from our every day life 'conspire' to upset our nature and the balance of our bodies and among them the power of the mind is the one that is most corrupted by many 'ideals' we consider unchallengeable like the power of other people over us, the pursue of happiness through enrichment, or to feel powerless because we refuse to exercise our individuality and to maintain our dignity. Of course diets as well as environment count, but I think it is in the freedom of human spirit, trumpet by the pressures of our 'concessions' to modern life, which impact most when acquiring this 'rare' illnesses.

The article claims "new health coverage for uninsured Americans with health problems won't be cheap" - but compared to what?

The article failed to point that this was the stop gap for those with pre-existing conditions who usually would not get covered anywhere else or have to pay premiums more than three times that declared "not cheap" in the article!!!

I currently am quoted, in New York, about $1200 for coverage. And the article claims those plans are not cheap because they have "premiums averaging $300 to $600 a month in the largest states"

Isnt "cheap" a relative word? $5 health insurance could be cheap or $250, or $0 compared to what one could get it at? IS it not cheap in comparison to Canada or the UK or CURRENT PRIVATE HEALTH INSURACE or FREE health insurance?

SHAME ON THE JOURNALIST AND HIS EDITOR FOR PANDERING TO SENTIMENTS AND ARRIVING AT AN ARTICLE TITLE THAT FITS PUBLIC OPINION.

Supermarket shopping is a death-defying process. No, I'm not referring to the busloads of codgers cramming the aisles and barring all escape routes from a bakery department blaze. Nor do I consider as any big deal the risks involving the salmonella rinse featured in the processing of those bagged salads. I've developed immunity to the army of the living dead and to Mexican-borne diseases, the latter to the point where I could drink Tijuana Springs water, if anybody had the nerve to market it. I'm talking about the dangers lurking in the dairy section.

I'm no biologist. I don't know what the exact health effects are for consuming milk-based products that are beyond shelf life. It can't be a good thing. Spoilage is a concern for us, for the very reason that we don't know what the consequences are. There must be a reason, beyond the risk of fouling the interior of the refrigerator, for putting dates on dairy products. I'll assume that it's safety-related, which brings us to our story.

In late April 2010, I was shopping at Waldbaum's in Centereach. When one is unemployed, going after sale items becomes more important than ever. A particular brand of cream cheese was on special. I grabbed one, turned it over to check the date and saw that only a few days of shelf life remained. There was a store clerk arranging things in an adjacent refrigerator bin and I walked over to him. My intent was strictly informational, just a heads up that Mister Cream Cheese was ready to push up daisies. When I informed him of the situation, he took the container from me and said the following:

"That's okay, somebody will buy it." With that, he returned the container to the shelf and I laughed.

I guess I didn't expect that level of crass honesty. I don't know why not, since I'm an acknowledged king of the form. In my own defense, I do draw the line at poisoning customers. Amazed, I took my fresher version of the product, went home and reported the incident to corporate headquarters. I received a reply a day or two later, Case Number 540363-A, informing me that they took such reports seriously and would address the issue at the appropriate level. I didn't expect, nor did I receive, a follow-up report regarding any corrective action taken. I haven't shopped at the Centereach store since.

Moving ahead to today – another Waldbaum's, the one in Selden, and yet another cream cheese event. This time, it wasn't a case of the product nearing its demise. No, this time the date read "May 21, 2010." In neither case was I looking for expired goods; I just happened to pick the one. Another store clerk loomed and I greeted him with the bad news of a package left to rot, or worse. His reply:

"It was an accident." It came out so quickly, I'm convinced it was a rehearsed line. I wasn't having any of it. I told him it doesn't meet the definition of an accident, especially since it's happened to me so recently. Neglect isn't an accident; it's a failure to apply a level of care equal to the responsibility attached. It was like talking to a stuffed animal.

We have our corrective action, for what little it's worth. Someone at corporate likely decided that the best course would be to stay the course and have employees plea ignorance and apologize when caught. Otherwise, sell off the existing stock and let dates be damned. I'm challenging anybody in the legal department at A & P Corporate to produce a timely, clearly worded and properly executed procedure to prevent what amounts to a major violation of local and state health codes.

Warning – this is my bailiwick. I may not be working now, but when I was, I inspired fear as a quality assurance auditor. I don't fall for word tricks or trip over circular flowchart logic. I know when things don't work and I know why they don't, and root causes usually lay with executive personnel. Clearly, I've just given a good reason to keep me out of the employment stream, boat rocker that I am.

You may ask where the aforementioned governmental bodies charged with enforcing health codes are hiding. I don't know and I don't care. This is strictly a "buyers beware" issue. I check the dates. Unfortunately, those fossils shuffling around the produce department and jamming the aisles may assume (wrongly) that someone is protecting their interests. I guess we can ascribe this as a method for thinning the herd, but its coming to light won't play well for the AARP radical set and could lead to boycotts. This issue demands some sort of address.

There is, of course, a fix for this. Add product lot numbers to the barcode SKU. It probably won't happen, but think of the possibilities. Supermarkets are tracking shopping habits, offering discounts only when scanning a personalized shopper card during checkout. They know what I'm buying and when I'm buying it. With the added lot information, the opportunities for customer-specific offerings are endless. It's not limited to dairy and other limited shelf life items, either.

Sure, that can of chili is dated out to the 22nd century (and guaranteed to survive a nuclear blast), but there does come a time when the larder needs to be rotated, just as much in our pantries as in the markets where we shop. An e-mail or postal reminder, with a coupon attached, of the need to replace or restock a food item will generate additional sales for the supermarket. While we're there, we might pick up some milk and eggs, or even cream cheese. In the meantime, I'll sit back and wait for the court order to show-cause why this post should remain up. I'll invite the judge to meet at a local Waldbaum's and watch me show some cause.

New study tells me that mom's cause childhood obesity. I think Mom's also cause Dad's obesity too, what do you think?

"There is such a thing as pussy power," Betty Dodson was saying last night. "Don't give it away. Understand it's your power and use it accordingly." She turned to a friend. "I just laid out pussy power," she said gleefully.

Walgreens late Wednesday reversed a decision to carry genetic test kits in its stores after the U.S. Food and Drug Administration began an investigation of the supplier and product.